Blank or coloured?

Sometimes i wonder if u guys out there will 4get me with time? will there be a day where no one finds interest in my writing-- i fear the inability to share my innermost thoughts but yet shun away when people close knows too much -- but will people who duno me personally care? am i thinking too much?... is my life colorful or issit just a blank white sheet with comparison to u guys out there? am i missing out on life?... i feel very lost-- need someone arnd to guide me -- a very vulnerable stage of my life --


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Anyway, i just tendered my resignation letter -- is it a hasty decision? i hope not? i have been saying i wanna leave but the moment i handed my letter over, i feel sad -- i kind of miss this place -- i kindof feel attached to a place i have been criticising over a year -- only then i realise that it isnt sooo bad afterall -- i hate this kind of feelign -- its the same for relationships... its always when i wanna throw in the towel that i feel that its my loss-- and regret it -- why didnt i appreciate it while it lasted --

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i thought Danny didnt care about me anymore -- i threw alittle tantrum last evening -- but when he came all the way down to MArina Sq to fetch me home -- i suddenly felt bad --- have i made him go an extra mile to do something i do not deserve of -- i know he has been very giving towards me recently -- if he happens to be reading this, i apologise for my unreasonableness at times -- i am under stress -- should i be able to pick my life pieces back together, i will service u better then b4... i promise ok dude... and i hope the bloody sex we had yesterday didnt scare u haha --

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I"M BLEEDING TO DEATH... I'M SO GROUCHY-- LIKE AN OLD WOMAN WITH DENTURES AND WALKING STICK--